just fine

One of the greatest pleasures in my life might sound strange. Anyone that knows me is well aware that the Cardo Funk class I go to Mondays, Tuesdays, and Saturdays is one of the things that keeps me going. Some days, like yesterday after dealing with my insurance company, I have to talk myself into going. I don't understand why this happens because I always feel 100% better after class.

It's not just the fact that I get an amazing workout, that the endorphins kick in, that I get to dance and not care about anything or anyone that worries me for an hour. In this class of 70-100 people, I have found heros and teachers and friends. I am inspired by the people I have met in class, and those I just see and don't know their names. We dance and laugh and sweat together, and sometimes hug and cry and pray. It's more than an aerobics class, it's kind of like church. For a time it was more church than I was getting anywhere else. It's funny, all the regulars have their little spot in class, like people have their favorite pews. Our teacher, Kym, is one of the most amazing people I have met in my lifetime. She manages to make a dance fitness class into something so much more than that. We are a community.

Yesterday I was feeling so frustrated and a little defeated by life. Some days you feel like you are battling life instead of living it. I left work, and literally had a hard time leaving the building and getting to my car without crying. But I made it to class, trusting that I would leave different than I arrived. I had an interesting conversation with one of the women whose little "spot" in class is next to mine. She mentioned that there had been this moment in class on Saturday. One of the women in our class, Jaquitta, was diagnosed with breast cancer last year and has been going through chemo and radiation. She took off her ball cap during class to reveal her beautiful head of hair that is growing back slowly. People surrounded her, hugged her, celebrated that moment with her. Laughter through tears. In Cardio Funk aerobics. The woman next to me said, "It puts everything in perspective, doesn't it?"

It does. I don't feel that it puts it in perspective because Jaquitta has cancer and I don't, and that makes me grateful that I don't have cancer. Obvioulsy, I am grateful for that, but it is more than that. As Jaquitta has dealt with and accepted the disease, and battled and risen above, she has been so open and honest about everything that has come with that struggle. What I have learned from her is to love and to live life. She writes a blog on the website for the TV station where she is an anchor, and she always signs, "love, live life." Today is today. Live today. Love what is good today. Love that you can get through whatever it is that you must face.